{"id":349,"date":"2025-11-04T09:24:59","date_gmt":"2025-11-04T08:24:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/?p=349"},"modified":"2025-11-04T09:30:19","modified_gmt":"2025-11-04T08:30:19","slug":"piekeren-stoppen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/piekeren-stoppen\/","title":{"rendered":"11 tips to stop fretting"},"content":{"rendered":"<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Your brain processes thousands of thoughts every day. Research shows that many of those thoughts are repetitive and a large portion of them are negatively colored. That explains why you sometimes get stuck in the same scenarios without moving forward. It then feels like your brain is in a kind of <em>run<\/em> keeps spinning. That's what mulling is all about. And fretting can make your life very small. You feel tension in your body and you find it harder to unwind. Even nice things can feel less nice; you can no longer enjoy them. Therefore, it is valuable to understand exactly what mulling is and how you can learn to stop mulling. We have collected 11 tips for you that can help you do that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">What is brooding?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Mulling is a mental form of lingering on the same thought. Your brain creates worst case scenarios, ruminations and worries. Often these are not even facts, but possible outcomes that may never happen. Your brain tries to maintain control over this, but in reality you actually lose control. It can make you sleepy, but not put you to sleep. And that's why many people are especially troubled by stopping brooding in bed. You lie still and have no distractions. Exactly then your brain becomes like a trampoline. But also throughout the day it can hinder you in your actions. In the long run, this can cause physical complaints, <a href=\"\/en\/burn-out-voorkomen\/\">including burnout<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">How to stop fretting: 11 tips<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Fortunately, with training, simple changes and more conscious choices, you can stop fretting. It doesn't have to remain a fixed pattern. Below are 11 practical, people-centered tips that can help you make quitting fretting realistic, achievable and concrete. And perhaps more importantly, you don't have to do it alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1. Write down your thoughts daily<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Thoughts become calmer when you can put them into words. Writing gives structure. You don't have to create an elaborate journal form for this; two minutes can be enough. This especially helps you stop fretting in bed because your brain stops \u2018storing\u2019 all those thoughts. You can let them go and thus hopefully sleep more peacefully.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">2. Use a \u2018stop phrase.\u2019<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Your brain responds strongly to commands. Phrases like \u2018not right now\u2019 or \u2018stop, this is something for later\u2019 work surprisingly well. The idea is not to suppress your thoughts, but to close a door, so to speak. This is how you learn how to stop fretting in a clear, concrete way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">3. Train your breathing<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Your breathing is a switch. When your exhalation is longer than your inhalation, your nervous system switches to rest. This is biologically determined. Therefore, there are some simple stop brooding exercises you can do anywhere. For example: four counts in, six counts out. Later in the blog we share some more fine exercises.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">4. Bring back focus with a small task<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">No big to-do list, just something simple. Think washing dishes, cleaning out a cabinet or taking a walk. Your brain works better when there is a concrete action. In doing so, you break through the mental <em>run<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">5. Limit peak time to one moment a day<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Give yourself a \u2018thinking slot. For example, between 4:00 pm and 4:15 pm. That is the time when you are allowed to think about certain things that are on your mind, but really only then. Your brain thus learns that mulling is no longer a random activity. That way, you can stop, or at least reduce, brooding for the rest of the day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">6. Look critically at your input<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">News, social media, discussions, WhatsApp groups, they fill your brain with noise. And noise becomes fuel for doomsday scenarios. Therefore, less stimuli is actually no longer a luxury, but a must. That way you can take better care of yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">7. Employ physical movement<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Movement makes space in your mind. Not because your thoughts disappear, but because they become less prominent. Muscles and brain work together, so an activity like walking, biking or stretching can be enough.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">8. Just before you go to sleep, do a relaxation exercise<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It is smart to give your brain a rest just before you go to sleep. Preferably, this means no more screen time. Rather, choose, for example, a relaxation exercise or another quiet activity. This brings attention to your body instead of your thoughts. This way, stopping fretting in bed becomes a lot more achievable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">9. Learn to sense difference between fact and story<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">A lot of stress comes not from the situation itself, but from the story your brain makes of it. For example, it is a fact that you have an appointment tomorrow. However, your brain turns it into a very elaborate story, such as: \u2018what if something goes wrong during the appointment? Learning to see that difference empowers you and can help you stop fretting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">10. Discuss your concerns with someone<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Worrying only gets worse when you keep all your thoughts to yourself. It gets a lot less when you tell honestly what you are feeling. But choose someone who will really listen and not just transmit. Connecting with others makes your worries lighter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">11. Call in a coach if you are not breaking patterns<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Sometimes thoughts are so persistent that you need professional guidance. Not because you can't do it yourself, but because you don't have to do everything on your own. A coach looks with you, helps organize, zooms out and makes room for clarity. Such guidance is not woolly, but focused on practical steps to really make quitting fretting work. For example, you can look at <a href=\"\/en\/life-coaching\/\">our life coaching<\/a> for inspiration. Just as a starting point to feel that there is professional support that is humane and realistic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Stop fretting exercises on breathing<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">As one of the tips above described, you can try stopping fretting with exercises. We have collected some fine breathing exercises for you that you can apply right away: \u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>The 5 by 5 exercise: <\/strong>Choose five things you can see. Name them within yourself one by one. Next, choose five things you can hear. Name those, too. It gets your brain out of \u2018scenario mode and back to the here and now.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>The 60-second pen<\/strong>: Take pen and paper and for one minute write down everything that comes to mind. Stop after exactly 60 seconds. The time limit makes your brain feel that it is \u2018done.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>The cold water touch<\/strong>: briefly hold your hands or wrists under cold water. The stimulus in your skin makes space in your mind. It is simple at first glance, but works surprisingly well.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>The yes or no check<\/strong>: ask yourself one question: \u2018Can I solve this NOW? If the answer is no: write it down for later. If the answer is yes: then do the smallest doable step.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><strong>The body localization<\/strong>: sit down, briefly close your eyes and ask yourself, \u2018Where in my body am I feeling this right now? Then place a hand on that point. Not to push it away, but to acknowledge it.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Worrying is not a character trait. It is a strategy of the brain. Only that strategy often doesn't work. You're not a wrong person if you fret, you're just someone trying to find a grip. And that means there is room to make other choices. Stopping fretting starts with awareness and the <a href=\"\/en\/je-innerlijke-stem\/\">learning to listen to your inner voice<\/a>. Ultimately, it's about small actions that you repeat every day. In this way, thoughts become less dominant. Your body becomes calmer, your nights get better and your days feel lighter. So, the next time you think, \u2018How can I stop fretting? Then think back to the above tips!<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Je hersenen verwerken elke dag duizenden gedachten. Onderzoek laat zien dat veel van die gedachten zich herhalen en dat een groot deel ervan negatief gekleurd is. Dat verklaart waarom je soms blijft hangen in dezelfde scenario\u2019s, zonder dat je verder komt. Het voelt dan alsof je brein in een soort loop blijft draaien. Dat is [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":261,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"hf_cat_post":[],"class_list":["post-349","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/349","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=349"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/349\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/261"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=349"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=349"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=349"},{"taxonomy":"hf_cat_post","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/rogerrutten.nl\/en\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/hf_cat_post?post=349"}],"curies":[{"name":"WP","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}